Mean

Growing up, I feel like I’ve always been that one kid that figured everything out.
I was so mean. To almost everyone. People. Friends. Even guys I tried to pursue. It’s not really a good trait but at the same time, it is.

I’ve recently seen myself as a very open person. I’m more vocal than I used to be. I used to be a little bit reserved and nice and polite to the people I’m close to and not close to.

Recently, there has been a series of events where I feel like there’s no way around saying or doing certain things. As a leader, I feel like I have to get straight to the point. Usually, to not hurt people’s feelings, I talk around the bushes. But no more. I get to the point, no matter if there’s tears or not. Though most people like my boyfriend or even my sister say, ” Hey Vy, that’s pretty mean.”.
Well…. I’m not trying to be nice. I’m trying to get my point across and sometimes, they can’t seem to get it.
I’m at a position of power as an adviser for a cultural club and I’ve never had to work with so many incompetent people. I really have to get it off my chest.

Most of them do no good work and not even exceptionally good at all, whatsoever. The president, is one of my best friends and the secretary as well. But the president doesn’t understand how to execute leadership and the secretary will… is just a secretary.

I’m actually very happy with myself that  I can be vocal and loud and weird and mean and I will always have someone that accepts me. Like my boyfriend and my sister.

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The Path to Passion

The flow of school has definitely changed since the 3 years of being in college. And I apologize for not writing more. I’ve been bringing in my tablet to go to school and I’m always delaying the blog posts because I tend to do my food blogs first then my life blogs.

So if you guys wanna check my food blog, come check it out here:
doubletummy.wordpress.com

Anyways, so I’ve been trying to overachieve in all my classes to get a 4.0 GPA for the fall semester and hopefully with 4.0 GPA for the spring because truthfully, my GPA is horrible, It’s a 2.5 right now. And I want to graduate with a 3.0 GPA.

So far in the 4 weeks that I’ve been at school, my classmates and friends believe I can achieve a 3.3 or 3.4 GPA in the pace I’m going. But I suck at papers and tests. So I hope things work out for me (most of my classes are based on projects, classwork, homework, and essays).
To elaborate on my title, I’ve been struggling with trying to find out what I like to do or what I want to do in my future and career. All I know was that I am a Information Systems Operations Management major and I love to organize and execute plans.

Like every other college student and even some graduates, I have no idea. But today, I was working on a case study for my systems design class and we had to analyze the problem and find solutions.
To be honest, I’ve never felt so excited to analyze something and put it into data and plan it all out. I have the general idea of how it works and I’m still learning the concepts. But I think I was meant to do something like that.

It can go down to being an analyst, database administrator or even a it project manager. I like anything to do with the careers and the skills needed for the careers.

Super happy and blessed. I’m really surprised. I feel like I’m actually growing up.

People I dislike.

Not that I have the time to tell you all the people I dislike. But I will tell you one of them. I hate quitters. I dislike people who do not try to show any leadership skills or any confidence.

It’s not easy, I get it. Weirdly, it came to me very easily to be a leader. But not everyone is like me, I get that. I get it that it takes time to grow to become a better person and a leader. But there are certain people who has crossed the line with that one.

I used to be in a cultural club at my university but now that i’m a senior, i want to take control of my life and look for jobs, and careers and not stress and finish school. But along the lines, I go for the ride too. I still go to meetings and I stop by to check who will be there to do work and who wont.

So the people in this eboard of this club used to be my little freshmens, i am their senior. I was in the higher ranks of the positions by them so I know it all, along with 2 seniors that already has graduated. And man let me tell you, the president is a nice guy, but he’s a pushover. He doesnt want to be mean because they’re his friends. But the things about working in a club or group is that if you’re the leader, you’re suppose to lead.

That is all.

22nd Birthday

I don’t know about you but I’m feeling 22~~!!

Wow. Full of cheese. Well anyways, yes, I am officially 22. The most useless age among lots of other useless ages. But I have to say I love it but I hate it.

I love it because it reminds me of where I am in my life. This is the age I will be graduating with. This is the age where I have successfully obtain my spot as a senior in college, an apartment, a car, a pet thats a cat, and work. This is the age of moving on and forward to the real world. Thats why I love this age.
I’ve gotten amazing gifts such as a handmade Asian painting of my name from am friend, a bath headband and asian made pens from my best friend and a hoodie from another friend and also Marc Jacobs sunglasses, a grumpy cat plushie, a card and a file folder organizer. And I can’t forge’t from the amazing boyfriend i had, he hand written a letter for me that only say… “Happy Birthday Vy Ha, 22nd on the 16th, of September 2015, Yours Truly, Long N. ” …. =_=

But he later made me mac and cheese (homemade) for my dinner because I will be working all night till 9 so I’ll be busy till my birthday ends.

But why I hate it. My birthday is like the synonym of Friday the 13th. Good things always…. and i mean it, quote me, “Good things always happen to me on Friday the 13th.” And the upcoming week before my birthday, I got my period (TMI) and it was so much flow (TMI) and I GOT LOTS OF CRAMPS AND HEADACHES. I felt weak and sad. Not only that, I was going through my first week of school on my birthday. Every fucking year, and of course it had to be me that goes through with it when everyone is all idle with their school work and stuff and I only hoped people would remember my birthday because it was on Facebook.

Let’s not forget the tears. I tend to fight with mostly the guy I end up dating around my birthday. Shit like this always happen and I always cry on and before my birthday. EVEN THIS BIRTHDAY. Yes, I did cry and fought with my boyfriend and over something stupid. And as much as I hate being nice to people on their birthday but it’s kind of their birth right. I don’t want people feeling like shit on the day they were born and be happy that they exist. I just wish some people would stop fucking around and just hold their tongue for 1 fucking day.

It’s someone’s birthday, let them have this day and you can have the rest of 364 days to start stupid shit with them later. That’s what I have to go through.

What’ worse is that everything dies down after my birthday and I fucking wish I didnt have to go through with that on my birthday. But I had to. It happens every fucking year. Damn

First day for my last year

Today was my first day of classes for the last year of college.

But I had the leisure to start at 1 pm unlike many students who start very early in the morning. But it was very tough for me. I still felt the same nervousness as I did when I was a freshmen. It was hard to breathe, my stomach was hurting and I felt like I needed to poop.

But after awhile, after getting out of the train station, I went to meet up with a classmate who is my friend that was taking the same class as I did. I told her that I was still feeling nervous because it’s my last year. And it was pretty scary. She felt the same way too.

Having to see a whole bunch of new freshmen wearing the university’s tee-shirt saying “Year of 2019” made me have goosebumps because I was in that position about 3 years ago. I didn’t feel like a student anymore. I felt like a mentor or a teacher for the younger students that were coming in for the college experience.

My job doesn’t help with the nervousness either. I work at the ITS Service Center at my campus and there will always be students coming in with problems that they dont know how to fix or can’t fix and I have to do it for them because I have the knowledge and tools to help. I feel like such an adult about to blast into the real world.

But when I look at myself in the mirror, I feel like a child, and I’m scared to succeed and get a real job and buy a house and move out and be on my own. It’s fucking scary. But I have to go through with it because I can’t stop time. I want to and I don’t want to at the same time.

But still, I can’t stop time because it’s always going and moving forward. I just have to go.

Love Story (2)

I haven’t gotten a chance to get into another love story of mine but here we go~

So when I was in I believe 2nd grade, I really liked this Spanish kid from my class. He was a bully, and mean but I guess to me, it was attractive and he was fun and a clown in class. So I always had a crush on him.

Weirdly, I would stalk him during free time and recess. I guess I was becoming a dangerous girl at the time and I was always looking for my prince (hence the fairy tale complex I have).
I think he knew that I liked him a lot so he started to be more nice to me and not tease me or make fun of me. We became such good friends and we were always the two that always hanged out together. When I was that age, I was a bit of a tomboy, so I knew that guys didn’t think I had cooties or that I was one of the girls. I was one of the guys.

Nothing escalated from there. The only new things from that crush is that my mom knew and then after that I moved out of that school and got transferred to a new school. I never saw him again. But it didn’t bother me because I ended up liking a new kid in my new school and in my new class.

I’m such a crush player.

A broke college student’s feast

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This was one of my first meals in my new apartment. I remember being home alone and feeling like wanting to eat a rainbow (I’m serious).

So I first made rice and I suck at making rice. The easiest things to make in an asian household should be rice but I never learned how to cook it till I moved out of my parent’s house. And after, I made that orange stir fried noodles, that’s actually a cheese ramen I bought from market and I just cooked it regularly and stirred fried it. Later, I cooked Brussels sprouts with garlic and salt and pepper cooked in butter. I also cooked some beef chucks on the side and a bowl of corn and I got myself some green tea, soy milk and made a Vietnamese dipping sauce.

Sadly, I was alone at home so yes, I ate all of this in one sitting. I like cooking random things and these dishes didn’t go well together but they tasted good separately.

I was just so hungry. But trust me, if you asked me to cook you something, anything at all, I can do it!